Dawn That Never Comes
by LeSylph
Summary: She wanted out. Now. Starbuck


Normally I write Sharon/Helo one-shots but my friend requested that I write one for Starbuck and so I did :) Hope you enjoy it! Oh, it might be slightly out of character…I'll let you decide.

Disclaimer: I do not own Battlestar Galactica or any of the characters

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It wasn't so much the fact that she was stuck with Leoban that bothered her…it was the painful lack of copious amounts of alcohol. And men. Like Sam…or Lee…or any attractive man for the matter. Leoban just didn't cut it, which was why there was a strong need for the alcohol. If she had enough of that stuff in her it wouldn't matter who she frakked.

Hate wasn't the right word to describe how she felt. She was pretty sure that there wasn't any word that could adequately describe the way that she felt. A painful burning anger that ebbed and flowed and then exploded until all she saw was red and she could kill. Not that it did any good because he just kept coming back. Damn the cylons and their resurrection ships. They were like frakking cockroaches. An infestation that would never cease because no matter how hard you tried to kill them they just kept coming back.

She wanted out. Seriously. It was like being stuck in a frakking madhouse and sometimes she considered the fact that maybe she was crazy. Because being stuck in a house with an obsessed machine was like a sordid twisted nightmare. Oh who was she kidding, her whole life had spiraled down into a sordid twisted nightmare. First her little buddy Boomer had turned out to be a cylon. A cylon. Little Boomer who had been so sweet and innocent. A cylon. Damn them. Then she'd gone and fallen in love with a man who wasn't Lee and then she'd left said man to certain death while she returned safe and sound and Lee promptly kissed her. Then later on down the line she had shot Lee. Yep, shot him. Luckily he lived but oh, the angst did not stop there. No sir. She'd gone and slept with him and announced to the whole world she loved him, not that anyone heard but him, and then the next morning she'd gone and married Sam, the man she'd left to certain death, and now here she was on a planet obviously forsaken by the gods stuck with a machine who wanted to frak her.

Her life was worse then those damn soap operas little Boomer had insisted on watching.

Every time he touched her she felt herself gag. But what made her want to gag even more was that eventually the kissing suddenly didn't seem so…repulsive. Not that it mattered because the thought that it wasn't repulsive became repulsive and the cycle continued.

She wanted out. Seriously. Really. She wanted out, now. Because all of his talk about her and her special destiny was getting old. She was Kara Thrace…or Kara Anders…Kara Thrace-Anders. Kara Thrace. Should have been Kara Adama…or Kara Thrace-Adama. Not Lee…but Zack. Oh gods. Maybe that was part of the reason she had freaked. She should have been married to Zack and not Lee but then she'd gone and fallen for Lee and he was her dead fiancée's brother. Except that didn't exactly matter now because she was married to a pyramid player. Why was her life so complicated. Why.

And Lee of all people. He drove her crazy and not in a good sense…well in a better sense than Leoban. But Lee was impossible, he was self-righteous and idealistic and not in the way Helo was. Helo could be self-righteous at times and yes at times idealistic but somehow it worked for Helo. Somehow Helo managed to be right about what he believed to be the truth and somehow his idealistic ideas were at times actually plausible. And how was it that Helo out of all of them had the most steady relationship? He was in love with a cylon. He was in love with a machine. And yeah he and Sharon had some huge problems but he loved her with unconditional surrender.

Like Sam loved her.

She loved Sam, she really really did. That was why she'd married him, right? Or maybe she'd married him because she was afraid of what loving Lee meant. Loving Lee meant letting every barrier she had ever built be torn down because he was the only man that could manage it.

Except right now she really didn't want to think of any of that because right now what she wanted was to get out because if she had to eat dinner with Leoban one more time she was going to scream. Although that wasn't anything new, she'd been screaming for someone to come rescue her for a while. She wasn't the type of girl who usually needed rescuing but right now she could really use that knight in shining armor…or a guy with a standard issue sidearm.

She'd take either one.

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Yes, no?


End file.
